So I went to see my colleague in the business to find out about the changes that occurred when I was gone. I made arrangements to meet my colleague at the compound but I will not go in the office. I didn't want to be stuck in the office until late. No more late night meetings for me. It's all futile for me.
I went with the intention of airing my pet peeves and there are alot of pet peeves in the organization. The last meting that I attended, about eight weeks ago, There were the leaders up to there usual antics about begging for money, bad mouthing other organization, and talking about buying a bar so that the party would be more feasible. I almost walk out of the meeting because all that mentioned was against my ethics. I haven't been the same since.
Now that I come from my hiatus and find that there have been many changes in the organization. So I asked directly of what happened; what occurred that impeded the changes.
Hong told me the office moved because of the growth of the organization. However, I believe that there is more than that. Yes, the meeting were getting a bit too crowded, but it has always been crowded. The crowds don't bother me, its the length of time for the meetings that bothered me. Its the language and the way the meeting is conducted that bothered me.
Then I went into the business of wellness. The way the organization is, it has nothing to do with wellness. Going out and partying until the wee hours meeting movie stars that I have no idea who they are and have no interest in--all the activities thus far has no value to me. I am not going to invite people to go partying with star we just do know or care about. My friends really don't care about stuff like this. It's just not attractive enough.
Everything else remains the same. The preliminary meetings will still go on; the how2 may been renamed to something but it will go on. THe only consolation, if one can think of it as a consolation, is the meetings will be slightly shorter. But my heart is no in it at all.
If I were to ask myself if I should change my life to fit the organization or find an organization that suits my lifestyle? My heart is not in this organization. I really don't know what I am willing to do to succeed in this organization. Yes, I can spend more time in the organization (and cut downn my yoga time) but will I learn anything new?
I can start make calls but I just don't feel confident in my speech. People can tell that my heart is not in the stuff. I have no passion regarding this organization. Just like I told my colleagues at the end, nobody wants to invest money and not get nothing in return. At some point there will have toi be a cut out point. I have reach that point.
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Day 87
Day 87 is quite close to day 199, but it might as well be Day 1 again.
I reviewed my original intentions and discovered that I did achieve them. But I am not disappointed and still believe that LOA is always working to my benefit.
So lets review the original intentions.
As for renovating the house. I might fix it so it would look my attractive to potential buyer because the way it now, nobody with a sane mind would buy this place. One look at it and they might as well tear it down and build a new one. Or tear it down and sell the land.
But I already know where my new two bedroom condo will be located. I just have to find one in the right price range so I can create my new humble abode I just have to believe that I wil have the money and means to pay it all off so that I don't have to deal with a mortgage.
So for quitting my job. I don't think its a viable option now. But my job--the boring, time consuming job-- mutated. For the past month I set out to achieve the first and the best 1st National Awards and I did it. I have achieved what I set out to when the association was created -- the National Awards. And I achieved it with resounding accolades from members and the bosses.
The direction that TTA is going will definitely give my options to change my job. When my job changes, then I would essentially 'quit my job'. I had lunch with K. Dee today and it was a good one-on-one even though it was not official. The official will be on Thursday. But I told her a few things that my help me get the monetary reward I think I deserve.
I know I will get a raise and I will get a bonus too. But like I said, I really know know where or how I am going to earn 100,000/month passive income. Well, I am going to check on Shaklee again. I am still awaiting Kin's answer.
Then I went on vacation. I didn't visit any of the seven wonders but I did go to Bali for a yoga retreat. The best decision for my life at the moment. It was such a successful retreat that I made a new declaration or a manifestion that contains only a slither of the original intentions.
Not that the original intentions were not achievable but it was clear. Now that I have made new and clear intentions, paste at my closets and door so it will be 'in my face' . I canvisualize it everyday, meditate on it so I can realize it and"manifest" the reality.
As for practicing yoga daily. Well, since I'd been back, I have made it possible to practice daily--either by going to the studio or following the VDO at home. So now I have no excuse not to practice yoga daily. I read somewhere that a 15 minute /day yoga [practice is better than one 90 minutes yoga practice once a week. Sure I started out with a 90 minute session but I made arrangements that I can practice everyday. And today is my Day 1 for daily yoga practice.
And oh, I found the artist in me--the part of me that I have buried since I'd back from the US. I am building a batik studio up on the roof so I can practice and continue my art.
After all of this review I really should be disappointed because I am not even close to any of my original intentions. But, instead I'd been exhilarated by my new intentions and declare today Day 1 again.
I reviewed my original intentions and discovered that I did achieve them. But I am not disappointed and still believe that LOA is always working to my benefit.
So lets review the original intentions.
- To earn at least 100000 baht (about $2,900) a month so that renovate the house. I will start renovate the house by building a spare room and bathroom upstairs so that Sri can stay there. Then I will renovate my bedroom and bathroom in conjunction with expanding the balcony, and a small working area for myself. Then comes the back of the house where it will have to be rebuilt so I can expand the kitchen and dining room. Redecorate the living room completely and move laundry area from upstairs to downstairs.
- I want to quit my job and have time to grow my business. This would mean that I will have time to go to yoga everyday if I wish.
- My favorite: Travel the world and visit the "seven wonders of world" especially now that there are fourteen wonders.
As for renovating the house. I might fix it so it would look my attractive to potential buyer because the way it now, nobody with a sane mind would buy this place. One look at it and they might as well tear it down and build a new one. Or tear it down and sell the land.
But I already know where my new two bedroom condo will be located. I just have to find one in the right price range so I can create my new humble abode I just have to believe that I wil have the money and means to pay it all off so that I don't have to deal with a mortgage.
So for quitting my job. I don't think its a viable option now. But my job--the boring, time consuming job-- mutated. For the past month I set out to achieve the first and the best 1st National Awards and I did it. I have achieved what I set out to when the association was created -- the National Awards. And I achieved it with resounding accolades from members and the bosses.
The direction that TTA is going will definitely give my options to change my job. When my job changes, then I would essentially 'quit my job'. I had lunch with K. Dee today and it was a good one-on-one even though it was not official. The official will be on Thursday. But I told her a few things that my help me get the monetary reward I think I deserve.
I know I will get a raise and I will get a bonus too. But like I said, I really know know where or how I am going to earn 100,000/month passive income. Well, I am going to check on Shaklee again. I am still awaiting Kin's answer.
Then I went on vacation. I didn't visit any of the seven wonders but I did go to Bali for a yoga retreat. The best decision for my life at the moment. It was such a successful retreat that I made a new declaration or a manifestion that contains only a slither of the original intentions.
Not that the original intentions were not achievable but it was clear. Now that I have made new and clear intentions, paste at my closets and door so it will be 'in my face' . I canvisualize it everyday, meditate on it so I can realize it and"manifest" the reality.
As for practicing yoga daily. Well, since I'd been back, I have made it possible to practice daily--either by going to the studio or following the VDO at home. So now I have no excuse not to practice yoga daily. I read somewhere that a 15 minute /day yoga [practice is better than one 90 minutes yoga practice once a week. Sure I started out with a 90 minute session but I made arrangements that I can practice everyday. And today is my Day 1 for daily yoga practice.
And oh, I found the artist in me--the part of me that I have buried since I'd back from the US. I am building a batik studio up on the roof so I can practice and continue my art.
After all of this review I really should be disappointed because I am not even close to any of my original intentions. But, instead I'd been exhilarated by my new intentions and declare today Day 1 again.
Sunday, November 25, 2007
Alas, my last day. . .
I consider my retreat/vacation is resounding success. It's been a week since I'd been back and I am keeping my artistic and adventurer mindset close to my heart.
My last 1.5 days in Bali is spent being a tourist. I went to the temples and took lots of picture, just because I can. I went shopping for last minute gifts just because I want too. For a person who have been to Bali, it was quite uneventful. However, for a first timer, it would be wonderful.
For any first timer considering going to Bali, do the usual Bali tour of going to temples, artist studios, cooking class, shopping and bar hopping--it would be a wonderful vacation.
For those who are looking for a good retreat--spiritually and relaxing, Bali would feed your the spirituality you need whatever creed you are. If you like culture, then Bali is for you. I am sure there are places like Bali, but Bali has won my heart, besides it's only 4 hours on plane.
Now that I'm back at home and back at work, I am making a conscientious decision to keep up my batik and yoga. I just spent alot of money to upgrade my yoga membership at one of my yoga studio. Also, I'd been shopping, both on-line and going to stores, to find batik books and batik supplies so I can build my batik studio. I have I place for it already--the roof.
I went to Chatuchak, or JJ as the local call it, yesterday, the famous weekend market. Like my girlfriend, Kin Yeung, my college roommate who visited a few years back, called it "the world's biggest junkyard" full of lovely junk and cheap. That exactly what it was.
I really want to find local batik supplies, so since I'd been back I'd been shopping--buying books, researching on-line, buying supplies. That's why I went to JJ even though it's my favorite place. I'd rather go to the shopping mall or an art supplies store for things like this, but alas, there not even a decent art supplies store in town. So I went to JJ find find--and almost more- that I need.
I got myself paraffin wax, pots and pans, clothes pins, a few other stuff I may need but I couldn't find beeswax. That is for next weekend when I am planning to go get myself fabric paints, beeswax, cotton materials, frames, and brushes.
Oh, I almost forgotten, I singed up for art lessons starting in January. Although the class is large--6 people have already signed up (I'm hoping a few people will dropout by the time the class starts) but classes and workshops are few and far in between.
By next week I can prepare myself a small studio so I can do stuff there.
My last 1.5 days in Bali is spent being a tourist. I went to the temples and took lots of picture, just because I can. I went shopping for last minute gifts just because I want too. For a person who have been to Bali, it was quite uneventful. However, for a first timer, it would be wonderful.
For any first timer considering going to Bali, do the usual Bali tour of going to temples, artist studios, cooking class, shopping and bar hopping--it would be a wonderful vacation.
For those who are looking for a good retreat--spiritually and relaxing, Bali would feed your the spirituality you need whatever creed you are. If you like culture, then Bali is for you. I am sure there are places like Bali, but Bali has won my heart, besides it's only 4 hours on plane.
Now that I'm back at home and back at work, I am making a conscientious decision to keep up my batik and yoga. I just spent alot of money to upgrade my yoga membership at one of my yoga studio. Also, I'd been shopping, both on-line and going to stores, to find batik books and batik supplies so I can build my batik studio. I have I place for it already--the roof.
I went to Chatuchak, or JJ as the local call it, yesterday, the famous weekend market. Like my girlfriend, Kin Yeung, my college roommate who visited a few years back, called it "the world's biggest junkyard" full of lovely junk and cheap. That exactly what it was.
I really want to find local batik supplies, so since I'd been back I'd been shopping--buying books, researching on-line, buying supplies. That's why I went to JJ even though it's my favorite place. I'd rather go to the shopping mall or an art supplies store for things like this, but alas, there not even a decent art supplies store in town. So I went to JJ find find--and almost more- that I need.
I got myself paraffin wax, pots and pans, clothes pins, a few other stuff I may need but I couldn't find beeswax. That is for next weekend when I am planning to go get myself fabric paints, beeswax, cotton materials, frames, and brushes.
Oh, I almost forgotten, I singed up for art lessons starting in January. Although the class is large--6 people have already signed up (I'm hoping a few people will dropout by the time the class starts) but classes and workshops are few and far in between.
By next week I can prepare myself a small studio so I can do stuff there.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Nirvana Batik
Besides the LOA workshop, I wanted to learn batik. I have always been fascinated by batik- the art of dying, waxing, textile designs. Since childhood, I have always attempted Batik to a certain degree of success. I designed material for a dress, a wall hanging and now a painting. I am not a expert and certainly would like to go back to have some intensive training-- just because I want to.
I made a lovely, vibrant batik painting of tropical fishes. I know that the coloring and sequence of the dye has a lot to do with Nyoman's (my teacher) direction and guidance, but the piece is so beautiful that I'm going to frame it and show it to the world. One day, I'll be back learning from him again.
Since my return to home I have been researching where I can get batik supplies. I bought the janting - the traditional pen-like stick for waxing the materials. This weekend, I plan to go the weekend market and get pots and pans for the wax, and if I can find the wax, paint brushes, etc.
If worse comes to worst, that I couldn't find any supplies at all - I found many websites that selling batik stuff. I will carry on with this hobby.
I can imagine myself doing pillow covers for gifts to my friends and family. Not for this Christmas, but for next year--all year long. And starting next January I am taking art lessons every Saturday just because I want to.
If I learned anything from the law of attraction these 83 days (out of 100 days) is the universe will provide. Fast or slow, it's really up to you and the vibration you send out to the universe. Perhaps my lessons for law of attraction is done for now, however, I'm in such a high that I don't want this to go away at all.
Now only apply this to my business and I will succeed with earning my passive income of THB100,000 a month (perhaps more now). I will get the life I want, I will enjoy the life I want and I deserve I life I want.
I made a lovely, vibrant batik painting of tropical fishes. I know that the coloring and sequence of the dye has a lot to do with Nyoman's (my teacher) direction and guidance, but the piece is so beautiful that I'm going to frame it and show it to the world. One day, I'll be back learning from him again.
Since my return to home I have been researching where I can get batik supplies. I bought the janting - the traditional pen-like stick for waxing the materials. This weekend, I plan to go the weekend market and get pots and pans for the wax, and if I can find the wax, paint brushes, etc.
If worse comes to worst, that I couldn't find any supplies at all - I found many websites that selling batik stuff. I will carry on with this hobby.
I can imagine myself doing pillow covers for gifts to my friends and family. Not for this Christmas, but for next year--all year long. And starting next January I am taking art lessons every Saturday just because I want to.
If I learned anything from the law of attraction these 83 days (out of 100 days) is the universe will provide. Fast or slow, it's really up to you and the vibration you send out to the universe. Perhaps my lessons for law of attraction is done for now, however, I'm in such a high that I don't want this to go away at all.
Now only apply this to my business and I will succeed with earning my passive income of THB100,000 a month (perhaps more now). I will get the life I want, I will enjoy the life I want and I deserve I life I want.
Alone again. . . .
Now that I'm back to the same ol' grind, I am left alone to do whatever I want - which is very little.
I got this wonderful idea to take Art Lessons since I got in touch with my artistic side again during my holidays. I just have to keep it up.
Back to my holidays.
I mailed a postcard to my colleagues and remarking to the postman that I probably arrived to office before the card gets to them and it was true, he he....
One of the reasons I was so excited about my holidays in Ubud is that there is an on-going workshop regarding LOA. So, that really sealed the deal on going to Bali and attending the workshop.
I really didn't think much about LOA except for gratitude. Be thankful for everything that I have, everything that I am. The little quiz really surprised me because there was a question: If you know you were going to succeed, what is the one thing you would do?
To enjoy my life, was my answer. This one really surprise me because I didn't expect it to come out. My idea of success was the Nicole Kidman Omega watch, only it over and above what I am suppose to have. Yes, to own that watch would be a sue sign that I'd arrived to the outside world. A symbol of my success but how about the inside. So, for the inside, I must enjoy my life!
I also had trouble writing my order to the universe. Brenda started out by "I want to manifest. . . ." I got stuck on the word 'manifest' because its not a word I am familiar with. Manifestation implies a long drawn out process that is truly a labor of love. Does this mean that I don't love my life? My life is not my labor of love? If so, this scares me.
So I can't remember exactly what I wrote down that evening by here is my declaration:
You know what, I am enjoying my life now- at this very moment. I just a video of the entire night of accolades and pride for me and I still feel chills up and down my spine. That gala night was the best night of my career and gues what, it's not a bad career. Despite it pittance of a salary, I'd done so much for the association and I must say that I would miss it when I go.
Tomorrow is one-on-one with my manager. I really don't know what to say to her. I find it difficult now because I want to do so many things that is not related to this place : yoga, art, batik and one day, maybe have that art show showcasing my work. That would be outrageous.
I got this wonderful idea to take Art Lessons since I got in touch with my artistic side again during my holidays. I just have to keep it up.
Back to my holidays.
I mailed a postcard to my colleagues and remarking to the postman that I probably arrived to office before the card gets to them and it was true, he he....
One of the reasons I was so excited about my holidays in Ubud is that there is an on-going workshop regarding LOA. So, that really sealed the deal on going to Bali and attending the workshop.
I really didn't think much about LOA except for gratitude. Be thankful for everything that I have, everything that I am. The little quiz really surprised me because there was a question: If you know you were going to succeed, what is the one thing you would do?
To enjoy my life, was my answer. This one really surprise me because I didn't expect it to come out. My idea of success was the Nicole Kidman Omega watch, only it over and above what I am suppose to have. Yes, to own that watch would be a sue sign that I'd arrived to the outside world. A symbol of my success but how about the inside. So, for the inside, I must enjoy my life!
I also had trouble writing my order to the universe. Brenda started out by "I want to manifest. . . ." I got stuck on the word 'manifest' because its not a word I am familiar with. Manifestation implies a long drawn out process that is truly a labor of love. Does this mean that I don't love my life? My life is not my labor of love? If so, this scares me.
So I can't remember exactly what I wrote down that evening by here is my declaration:
I am so happy and fulfilled that my business is thriving and earning 100000/month passive income. My two bed-room condo on Sukhumvit near the On-nut station is all paid for and tastefully decorated with my art works. I even have a a small studio space to do my hobbies of drawings and batik. I am thankful my little Honda Jazz which I use when I go grocery shopping or out at night with my friends. I am thankful that I can travel to yoga retreats every three months and soon I will be earning my yoga retreats. Also, my sisters and families are enjoying the benefits of my joy since they are a part of my life. I love my life. Thank you universe!
You know what, I am enjoying my life now- at this very moment. I just a video of the entire night of accolades and pride for me and I still feel chills up and down my spine. That gala night was the best night of my career and gues what, it's not a bad career. Despite it pittance of a salary, I'd done so much for the association and I must say that I would miss it when I go.
Tomorrow is one-on-one with my manager. I really don't know what to say to her. I find it difficult now because I want to do so many things that is not related to this place : yoga, art, batik and one day, maybe have that art show showcasing my work. That would be outrageous.
Monday, November 19, 2007
I'd survived
I'd survived the first day of work after my wonderful, marvelous, blissful holidays at Bali. I'd survived the first day of work by pretending to work. This is really my favorite pastime.
to continue. . .
Fortunately, after a day of marathon walking more than 6 km, I had already planned a full-day in a spa, so I was set to enjoy myself.
A complementary pick-up came as appointed to start my day. I shared the ride with an American named Kris and his Japanese girlfriend who has visited about 40 times between the both of them. Yet, they lived in their own paradise--Hawaii-- still loved Bali enough to return again and again. This is only my second time and I have not left Ubud yet since I'd arrived.
Situated on the fringe of Ubud, one could not see house which has been converted to a spa from the main street. A cute bungalow house and a small garden equipped with a welcome dog named Bendi, you feel right at home with all the smiling staff to accommodate your ever move. A welcome drink and prelim questionnaire, you have a selection of aromatherapy oils and an array of body scrubs to choose from.
My spa package started with Ayudeveda - Chakra Dhara Massage, which is something new to me. Ayudeveda has been around the holistic scene for move than 5 thousand years and yet I have never experience it, so this would be my first. The important part of Ayudevedic massage is the Chakra Dhara where warm essential oils is poured onto the chakra points, the key energy points of the body, in order to balance the energy flow and purify the body, mind and spirit. The treatment is about 2.5 hours and its the hours of slow kneading of muscles and body into blissful pleasures. After the treatment, I was enlightened, to a certain degree.
to continue. . .
Fortunately, after a day of marathon walking more than 6 km, I had already planned a full-day in a spa, so I was set to enjoy myself.
A complementary pick-up came as appointed to start my day. I shared the ride with an American named Kris and his Japanese girlfriend who has visited about 40 times between the both of them. Yet, they lived in their own paradise--Hawaii-- still loved Bali enough to return again and again. This is only my second time and I have not left Ubud yet since I'd arrived.
Situated on the fringe of Ubud, one could not see house which has been converted to a spa from the main street. A cute bungalow house and a small garden equipped with a welcome dog named Bendi, you feel right at home with all the smiling staff to accommodate your ever move. A welcome drink and prelim questionnaire, you have a selection of aromatherapy oils and an array of body scrubs to choose from.
My spa package started with Ayudeveda - Chakra Dhara Massage, which is something new to me. Ayudeveda has been around the holistic scene for move than 5 thousand years and yet I have never experience it, so this would be my first. The important part of Ayudevedic massage is the Chakra Dhara where warm essential oils is poured onto the chakra points, the key energy points of the body, in order to balance the energy flow and purify the body, mind and spirit. The treatment is about 2.5 hours and its the hours of slow kneading of muscles and body into blissful pleasures. After the treatment, I was enlightened, to a certain degree.
Thursday, November 15, 2007
Bali food
Bali is catered to tourist.Every one and everything, so it seems, are made just for tourists. The best thing about Bali, maybe just Ubud, its the people. They are so accommodating and quite talkative.
Another good trait about the people, they aren't as aggressive as some people in other cities I'd visited - Beijing or Shanghai. Even the Thai merchants can be very aggressive at times. Once you say, 'no thank you' they stop and just smile.
Bali food is good and mild for a Thai who like here food rather spicy. So the Bali stomach is nothing to me. I find myself putting more sambal on my food so that I can get more bite. Surprisingly, the western food here is rather tasty. You just have to know where to go.
My favorite little 'warung' is Ayam Jakarta near the T-junction of Jl Hanoman and Jl Raya, about a couple blocks before the Ubud Market. An unassuming place, a hole in the wall type place with local food. The first time I went there, I have no idea what it was like. There were two touriststhere so I thought it must be fine if the 'farangs' are eating here. And yes, it was becausethe Mie Ayam, the local noodle soup, was as good as home. Very tasty too.
I went there are becuase I like it somuch. Their 'Mie Siyam Special' is like Mee Krob Lard Nah' but with more vegetable. It's must be the Hindu influence, vegetarian food is omnipresent. Although not a vegetarian, I love vegetables and Bali serves up plenty of vegetables to my liking.
I have been a happy camper when it comes to food.
Local bars:
I'd been to two bars since I'd arrived. I would have gone to more bars if there were more bars to visit. But Ubud, unlike Kuta, is not a night place. The town seem to roll up its carpet once past ten. Eleven is almost pumpkin hour to the locals. Ubud is an early town, morning is busy.
The Jazz Cafe, is the liveliest night life I experience in Ubud. It's comes highly recommended,for Lonely Planet genre, and it's the best in Ubud. I am sure that in Kuta there are livelier places.
Now, Warung Damatia, or Peace bar, really cater to locals. Ngura, my guide for the day, took me there on my request because I want to see how the local entertain themselves. It's like the 'bar-beer' at home but without the pool tables and food. Everyone gets a girl to sit with you, whether you want one or not. Realizing that Ngura might be bored with my company, I allowed Lita, our table girl, to sit with us as Ngura's companion.
Now, a place like Warung Damatia, athome with be dotted with men enjoy the girls' company and eating and drinking. But the warung does not serve food, only drinks. So I waited and waited for the dancing to started. I wanted to experience local dancing. Alas, not much happened, so we left at midnight back to the house.
Amazingly, late at night, Ubud's streets are ruled by the dogs. You can see dogs every where on the streets. They appear late into the night but during the day, the dog population seem to diminish. Where they disappear to, I don't know.
Until next time, namaste.
Ms. Mak
Another good trait about the people, they aren't as aggressive as some people in other cities I'd visited - Beijing or Shanghai. Even the Thai merchants can be very aggressive at times. Once you say, 'no thank you' they stop and just smile.
Bali food is good and mild for a Thai who like here food rather spicy. So the Bali stomach is nothing to me. I find myself putting more sambal on my food so that I can get more bite. Surprisingly, the western food here is rather tasty. You just have to know where to go.
My favorite little 'warung' is Ayam Jakarta near the T-junction of Jl Hanoman and Jl Raya, about a couple blocks before the Ubud Market. An unassuming place, a hole in the wall type place with local food. The first time I went there, I have no idea what it was like. There were two touriststhere so I thought it must be fine if the 'farangs' are eating here. And yes, it was becausethe Mie Ayam, the local noodle soup, was as good as home. Very tasty too.
I went there are becuase I like it somuch. Their 'Mie Siyam Special' is like Mee Krob Lard Nah' but with more vegetable. It's must be the Hindu influence, vegetarian food is omnipresent. Although not a vegetarian, I love vegetables and Bali serves up plenty of vegetables to my liking.
I have been a happy camper when it comes to food.
Local bars:
I'd been to two bars since I'd arrived. I would have gone to more bars if there were more bars to visit. But Ubud, unlike Kuta, is not a night place. The town seem to roll up its carpet once past ten. Eleven is almost pumpkin hour to the locals. Ubud is an early town, morning is busy.
The Jazz Cafe, is the liveliest night life I experience in Ubud. It's comes highly recommended,for Lonely Planet genre, and it's the best in Ubud. I am sure that in Kuta there are livelier places.
Now, Warung Damatia, or Peace bar, really cater to locals. Ngura, my guide for the day, took me there on my request because I want to see how the local entertain themselves. It's like the 'bar-beer' at home but without the pool tables and food. Everyone gets a girl to sit with you, whether you want one or not. Realizing that Ngura might be bored with my company, I allowed Lita, our table girl, to sit with us as Ngura's companion.
Now, a place like Warung Damatia, athome with be dotted with men enjoy the girls' company and eating and drinking. But the warung does not serve food, only drinks. So I waited and waited for the dancing to started. I wanted to experience local dancing. Alas, not much happened, so we left at midnight back to the house.
Amazingly, late at night, Ubud's streets are ruled by the dogs. You can see dogs every where on the streets. They appear late into the night but during the day, the dog population seem to diminish. Where they disappear to, I don't know.
Until next time, namaste.
Ms. Mak
So much to do, so little time
Tuesday:
I started out the day with a silver making class. Very interesting - my design that is. The Bali Sun - that's is what I will call it. I'd never done silver jewelry before so this is an experience. It's an experience that I probably will not do again because I will not make it my hobby. But it's a great experience and something I can be proud of.
So after the class, I decided to take the walking tour. My walking tour. Started at the Pura Taman Saraswati (Ubud Water Temple), behind the Cafe Lotus. Beautiful lotus pond with a cafe overlooking the pond. At night, there is the traditional dancing for the people to see. I could imagine it to be very beautiful and exciting, exotic, and romantic. So I took lots of photos.
Then I walk up to where I left off on Monday. Went back to the bridge before the Blanco Renaissance Musuem, but I couldn't find Pura Gunung Lebah, a temple with a view over the Cerik River). So I went to the 'Welcome to Penestanan' sign and walked up the steps. Walked up to some pictureques rice fields to Made's Warung - favorite hang out for both tourist and local.
Since I ate already, I didn't stop for lunch but cross the bridge over the stream. Further up there were steps leading to Pura Desa Puseh and bale agung, the village gathering place. There were people working on a project, restoring there village. Stopped at a small store to get some bottled water and rest.
Bali is very humid, so a little work can make you sweat profusely. One might think that I am also from the tropic, I should get use to the weather. Well, you never get use to it. And that's why retirees retire to Florida.
While walking along the road, up and down the hill, I was stopped by two little girls. Sisters, can't be more than four and six. "Photo, photo" they kept on yelling. My young models really love the limelight, so I obligate them with a couple to pictures.
Kept on walking until I ended up on a busy street. Asked directions to Sayan Terrace. Before I reached the Sayan Terrace Hotel, there is a newly built Four Seasons Villas. Why not, I thought, so I walked up to the guard and asked if I can take a walk in the premises. To my surprise, they happily obliged and down the hill I went.
all I saw was the gates and gardens of the villas. It rally didn't matter, I just want to say to the people at home that I visited the Four Seasons, Sayan Terrance. Photos would not describe the full. Alas, times like these, I want a partner so proper tourist photos can be taken.
I took a rest at the front to the driveway where guest would pull up to enter the cafe downstairs. I forgotten his name, but the door person at the Four Seasons was very accommodating. I was afraid I was disturbing his break for he was about to read the paper. After small talk, an interesting small talk, the sky appeared ominous and it's time to leave.
I went on to Sayan Terrace, the original resort, overlooking the rice terraces. I just wanted to see Colin McPhee's house in Bali. That was my intention for day, however, I was expecting a museum or even a house with a plague that stated historical importance of the house. I found nothing of the sort, just a broken house with the gate still intact.
Before I carried on my journey, I really didn't know where I was until a young, local fellow came to me and assisted me on my journey forward. Ngura was his name and he was so kind to take trekking through the hills and rice field.
He was a real village boy, not even from Ubud but a next village over. He was at Sayan Terrace, probably waiting for someone like me to come along so he can have something to do. He took me to views over Sungai Ayung, the rice fields, and over the river, crossed a rope bridge on to the holy spring.
The trek was about 6 kilometers around the terraces. I came across the irrigation dams which were built before WWII and are manually raised for the irrigation of the rice fields. The workings of the dams were decided by the group of the villagers who still farm the terrace. At the moment, mid November, the dams are raised so that field can be flooded for the seedlings. Depending which rice are grown, the average field can accommodate to four harvests. That's plenty of rice for Bali.
Besides rice, the farmers grow sweet potatoes, yams, tapioca and other crops. People live by the harvest of land and what is left over is sold. The forest also hole lots of wonders that I can not seen before like Vanilla plants and cacao fruits. Unfortunately, Indonesia do not make cocoa powder or chocolate from the cacao they grow. With the present day advances, there are some enterprising chefs that make chocolate from the local cacao but for local consumption.
Down to the river we went. There were fishing and bathing done on the Sungai river. Ngura pointed out the house where Claudia Schiffer and David Copperfield rent when they stay at Sayan. That was over ten years ago- there are many more houses for rent now.
For a short cut, we have to wade through the river to get back to Sayan Terrace. I was sure I wanted to go that way because I was in flip-flops and no change of clothes. So he convinced me to take off my short so it would not be wet- the river came only to the waistline. I knew he wanted to go swimming, with me of course, but I'm not partial to swimming or skinny dipping with a stranger. So when we got across the river, I told Ngura that he could go swimming (skiiny dipping) if he wants, but I am not going swimming.
This is best done in the dry season when the ground is not so damp and the river is almost dry. Trekking with only flip-flop is not recommended. On the way up, the ground seemed more slippery than on the way down. More wet spots one the way up which was a challenge because now my legs are about to give out and it's getting late. I went over and beyond my intentions for the day.
When we got back up the terrace, the same spot where we started, that is when I discovered that the broken down house is Colin McPhee's house. No museum, no plague, just a few pillars and the gate are left of the house. The local owner does not want to sell the land nor does he want to to fix the house (obviously). It's a pity because Colim McPhee was the composer who introduced the West to gamelan music--the eerie,haunting music one hears all over Bali. Bali would not be Bali with gamelan music lingering in the atmosphere.
It was not as late as I thought. Ngura gave me a ride on his bike to Ubud, my central station of Kafe, at 6 PM. I wanted to shake Ngura off, just because... but I didn't. Instead I asked for a local dinner and some night out.He hung on because he's a free lance guide and I'm his tourist for the day.
November is low and slow season for Bali. Back in Phuket or Samui, it's the beginning of high season, so I thought it would be the same in Bali. Serendipitously, it low season - just the way I like it because I get to see more and learn more.
to be continued. . .
I started out the day with a silver making class. Very interesting - my design that is. The Bali Sun - that's is what I will call it. I'd never done silver jewelry before so this is an experience. It's an experience that I probably will not do again because I will not make it my hobby. But it's a great experience and something I can be proud of.
So after the class, I decided to take the walking tour. My walking tour. Started at the Pura Taman Saraswati (Ubud Water Temple), behind the Cafe Lotus. Beautiful lotus pond with a cafe overlooking the pond. At night, there is the traditional dancing for the people to see. I could imagine it to be very beautiful and exciting, exotic, and romantic. So I took lots of photos.
Then I walk up to where I left off on Monday. Went back to the bridge before the Blanco Renaissance Musuem, but I couldn't find Pura Gunung Lebah, a temple with a view over the Cerik River). So I went to the 'Welcome to Penestanan' sign and walked up the steps. Walked up to some pictureques rice fields to Made's Warung - favorite hang out for both tourist and local.
Since I ate already, I didn't stop for lunch but cross the bridge over the stream. Further up there were steps leading to Pura Desa Puseh and bale agung, the village gathering place. There were people working on a project, restoring there village. Stopped at a small store to get some bottled water and rest.
Bali is very humid, so a little work can make you sweat profusely. One might think that I am also from the tropic, I should get use to the weather. Well, you never get use to it. And that's why retirees retire to Florida.
While walking along the road, up and down the hill, I was stopped by two little girls. Sisters, can't be more than four and six. "Photo, photo" they kept on yelling. My young models really love the limelight, so I obligate them with a couple to pictures.
Kept on walking until I ended up on a busy street. Asked directions to Sayan Terrace. Before I reached the Sayan Terrace Hotel, there is a newly built Four Seasons Villas. Why not, I thought, so I walked up to the guard and asked if I can take a walk in the premises. To my surprise, they happily obliged and down the hill I went.
all I saw was the gates and gardens of the villas. It rally didn't matter, I just want to say to the people at home that I visited the Four Seasons, Sayan Terrance. Photos would not describe the full. Alas, times like these, I want a partner so proper tourist photos can be taken.
I took a rest at the front to the driveway where guest would pull up to enter the cafe downstairs. I forgotten his name, but the door person at the Four Seasons was very accommodating. I was afraid I was disturbing his break for he was about to read the paper. After small talk, an interesting small talk, the sky appeared ominous and it's time to leave.
I went on to Sayan Terrace, the original resort, overlooking the rice terraces. I just wanted to see Colin McPhee's house in Bali. That was my intention for day, however, I was expecting a museum or even a house with a plague that stated historical importance of the house. I found nothing of the sort, just a broken house with the gate still intact.
Before I carried on my journey, I really didn't know where I was until a young, local fellow came to me and assisted me on my journey forward. Ngura was his name and he was so kind to take trekking through the hills and rice field.
He was a real village boy, not even from Ubud but a next village over. He was at Sayan Terrace, probably waiting for someone like me to come along so he can have something to do. He took me to views over Sungai Ayung, the rice fields, and over the river, crossed a rope bridge on to the holy spring.
The trek was about 6 kilometers around the terraces. I came across the irrigation dams which were built before WWII and are manually raised for the irrigation of the rice fields. The workings of the dams were decided by the group of the villagers who still farm the terrace. At the moment, mid November, the dams are raised so that field can be flooded for the seedlings. Depending which rice are grown, the average field can accommodate to four harvests. That's plenty of rice for Bali.
Besides rice, the farmers grow sweet potatoes, yams, tapioca and other crops. People live by the harvest of land and what is left over is sold. The forest also hole lots of wonders that I can not seen before like Vanilla plants and cacao fruits. Unfortunately, Indonesia do not make cocoa powder or chocolate from the cacao they grow. With the present day advances, there are some enterprising chefs that make chocolate from the local cacao but for local consumption.
Down to the river we went. There were fishing and bathing done on the Sungai river. Ngura pointed out the house where Claudia Schiffer and David Copperfield rent when they stay at Sayan. That was over ten years ago- there are many more houses for rent now.
For a short cut, we have to wade through the river to get back to Sayan Terrace. I was sure I wanted to go that way because I was in flip-flops and no change of clothes. So he convinced me to take off my short so it would not be wet- the river came only to the waistline. I knew he wanted to go swimming, with me of course, but I'm not partial to swimming or skinny dipping with a stranger. So when we got across the river, I told Ngura that he could go swimming (skiiny dipping) if he wants, but I am not going swimming.
This is best done in the dry season when the ground is not so damp and the river is almost dry. Trekking with only flip-flop is not recommended. On the way up, the ground seemed more slippery than on the way down. More wet spots one the way up which was a challenge because now my legs are about to give out and it's getting late. I went over and beyond my intentions for the day.
When we got back up the terrace, the same spot where we started, that is when I discovered that the broken down house is Colin McPhee's house. No museum, no plague, just a few pillars and the gate are left of the house. The local owner does not want to sell the land nor does he want to to fix the house (obviously). It's a pity because Colim McPhee was the composer who introduced the West to gamelan music--the eerie,haunting music one hears all over Bali. Bali would not be Bali with gamelan music lingering in the atmosphere.
It was not as late as I thought. Ngura gave me a ride on his bike to Ubud, my central station of Kafe, at 6 PM. I wanted to shake Ngura off, just because... but I didn't. Instead I asked for a local dinner and some night out.He hung on because he's a free lance guide and I'm his tourist for the day.
November is low and slow season for Bali. Back in Phuket or Samui, it's the beginning of high season, so I thought it would be the same in Bali. Serendipitously, it low season - just the way I like it because I get to see more and learn more.
to be continued. . .
Monday, November 12, 2007
Dali in Bali - Musuem Blanco
This is a not-to-miss museum when you are in Ubud, Bali.
It's a living musuem where the artist and his family still keep studio and workshop. You can tell which paints are from the family and which paintings are from the son. And they are both very good painters.
The nudes - most women which lethal breasts- are gracefully an vibrant like the balinese dancers. As mentioned, the breasts are lethal, ala Modonna during Jean-Paul Gaultier phase. They jet out to you like darts. Even then,, still very beautiful.
I was going for my Batik lesson today but no one picked up the phone. So tomorrow, I am going to silver making class instead. But I will take the batik class on Thursday.
Why Thursday. Since I have nothing planned for the afternoon, I went to the Ubud market. Found a lovely painting which I can't get out of my mind. After I'm here I'll go back to the market and buy the painting.
I went walking towards the market and found the Nirvana Batik place, where I am suppos to take my lesson. Lovely, very Balinese. They didn't have any lessons today because of the ceremonies. So I am going back on Thursday.
Naturally, I when to the market and on the way to the market, I found that lovely painting, that I am going to hang on top of the stairs when I get home.
Anyway, at th market, I went shopping. Sarong here, tops there, spices. Yes, the market is like any other tourist maket. They want to sell there wares.
I love Ubud. I am not leaving Ubud.
Om Shanti Om.
Namaste,
Ms. Mak
It's a living musuem where the artist and his family still keep studio and workshop. You can tell which paints are from the family and which paintings are from the son. And they are both very good painters.
The nudes - most women which lethal breasts- are gracefully an vibrant like the balinese dancers. As mentioned, the breasts are lethal, ala Modonna during Jean-Paul Gaultier phase. They jet out to you like darts. Even then,, still very beautiful.
I was going for my Batik lesson today but no one picked up the phone. So tomorrow, I am going to silver making class instead. But I will take the batik class on Thursday.
Why Thursday. Since I have nothing planned for the afternoon, I went to the Ubud market. Found a lovely painting which I can't get out of my mind. After I'm here I'll go back to the market and buy the painting.
I went walking towards the market and found the Nirvana Batik place, where I am suppos to take my lesson. Lovely, very Balinese. They didn't have any lessons today because of the ceremonies. So I am going back on Thursday.
Naturally, I when to the market and on the way to the market, I found that lovely painting, that I am going to hang on top of the stairs when I get home.
Anyway, at th market, I went shopping. Sarong here, tops there, spices. Yes, the market is like any other tourist maket. They want to sell there wares.
I love Ubud. I am not leaving Ubud.
Om Shanti Om.
Namaste,
Ms. Mak
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Day 2.5 -Bali
It's raining, nice soft raining mixed with spurts of strong rain. it's going to rain all day today.
Last night had a traditional massage. Good massage like the aromatherapy massage at home. But it made my shoulder stiff again. I guess I hold too much tension on my shoulders.
Then I went Naughty Nuri's. Overrrated. Not a place to dine alone. Need my steak gang with me to enjoy the experience.
Went to the Jazz cafe. Too early. I went too early and they close too early. Then I went to bed too late. So this morning I was stiff for class. But it was good.
I had Burkur Ayam- Balinese porridge. Very tasty. Will have to make it when I get home. It's a good light meal.
If I get anything from Bali, it would be motivated to go to yoga and losing weight. I going salad instead of rice. Try a flow follow with shake. Maybe this time I will lose this five kilos without even trying.
When I was do yoga this morning. I looked at my upper arms and felt the muscles. The muscles I once developed when I was still lifting weights. My arms still wiggle because I lost the tone, but I could feel the muscle coming back. I really love my arms.
My tightness from the hamstring is a signal that I am working my body. You see, you do need fancy gym and aerobic class to make muscles. Do what Madonna do, strike a pose and hold it. And hopefully, beautiful muscles will appear.
Now to find a real yogi to teach me in Bangkok. I have fallen in love with Hatha. I just have to keep it up while living in the big city like Bangkok. I have fallen in love with Ubud. I will come back to Bali again.
Until next time, namaste.
Ms. Mak
Last night had a traditional massage. Good massage like the aromatherapy massage at home. But it made my shoulder stiff again. I guess I hold too much tension on my shoulders.
Then I went Naughty Nuri's. Overrrated. Not a place to dine alone. Need my steak gang with me to enjoy the experience.
Went to the Jazz cafe. Too early. I went too early and they close too early. Then I went to bed too late. So this morning I was stiff for class. But it was good.
I had Burkur Ayam- Balinese porridge. Very tasty. Will have to make it when I get home. It's a good light meal.
If I get anything from Bali, it would be motivated to go to yoga and losing weight. I going salad instead of rice. Try a flow follow with shake. Maybe this time I will lose this five kilos without even trying.
When I was do yoga this morning. I looked at my upper arms and felt the muscles. The muscles I once developed when I was still lifting weights. My arms still wiggle because I lost the tone, but I could feel the muscle coming back. I really love my arms.
My tightness from the hamstring is a signal that I am working my body. You see, you do need fancy gym and aerobic class to make muscles. Do what Madonna do, strike a pose and hold it. And hopefully, beautiful muscles will appear.
Now to find a real yogi to teach me in Bangkok. I have fallen in love with Hatha. I just have to keep it up while living in the big city like Bangkok. I have fallen in love with Ubud. I will come back to Bali again.
Until next time, namaste.
Ms. Mak
Friday, November 9, 2007
I'd arrived . . .
At Bali to do my yoga retreat. What a wonderful idea. Just brilliant.
Bali is totally different from the last time I was here. I can't even remember the hotel I was in . Perhaps it doesn't exist anymore.
I attended a movement mediation class which about dancing the five rhythms with you eyes closed. It's an awesome experience. Like your body and spirit feel the beat and express yourself. It a totally different sensation than social dancing for two major points. You're dancing with your eyes closed and moving to 5 different rhythms which has escaped me. From what I remember-- flowing, sacatto and ending in stillness.
Oh my body ached from stiffness because I was letting go. I was aware of all the cracking, and creaking this tired body was experiencing. I can understand now that feeling of a real dancer, especially the modern dancers, why their music is so rhythmical and focused on percussion. Why the sudden twists and turns, the sudden flight of the body, the sudden stomp of the heel. I can understand how it can be very erotic, very exotic, very sensual as well as very sexual.
At times when I really go into the flow, I can see myself as a Martha Graham dancer or an Alvin Ailey dancer. And as I child I did love dance. I see my self as the Balinese dancer. But, alas, I keep on catching myself and sensing that I really am bogged down with structure.
I liked ballet because you are told what to do. I liked karate, because the kata has a structure. I liked structure, because when I catch myself stuck, I realized that I keep on doing the same movements.
The best part of the whole experience, seriously, is the 15 minutes meditation at the end. It was the best stillness I'd experienced. I was in corpse pose, feeling my breathing, being aware of my breathes and having the sensation of floating. I saw myself in a space suit, lying in a space pod and just floating. I know I wasn't asleep because even though I had the floating sensation, I was so grounded.
I am going back to the hotel now. It's been a long day with the travelling and the meditation class. I just wish there is a place like this in Bangkok. A place like this where the air is cleaner, more natural setting, eating healthy food, yet a little bit more modern.
Oh, did I tell you, my hotel is a bungalow in the middle of the rice paddy!
Namaste and hatsa mana.
Ms Mak
Bali is totally different from the last time I was here. I can't even remember the hotel I was in . Perhaps it doesn't exist anymore.
I attended a movement mediation class which about dancing the five rhythms with you eyes closed. It's an awesome experience. Like your body and spirit feel the beat and express yourself. It a totally different sensation than social dancing for two major points. You're dancing with your eyes closed and moving to 5 different rhythms which has escaped me. From what I remember-- flowing, sacatto and ending in stillness.
Oh my body ached from stiffness because I was letting go. I was aware of all the cracking, and creaking this tired body was experiencing. I can understand now that feeling of a real dancer, especially the modern dancers, why their music is so rhythmical and focused on percussion. Why the sudden twists and turns, the sudden flight of the body, the sudden stomp of the heel. I can understand how it can be very erotic, very exotic, very sensual as well as very sexual.
At times when I really go into the flow, I can see myself as a Martha Graham dancer or an Alvin Ailey dancer. And as I child I did love dance. I see my self as the Balinese dancer. But, alas, I keep on catching myself and sensing that I really am bogged down with structure.
I liked ballet because you are told what to do. I liked karate, because the kata has a structure. I liked structure, because when I catch myself stuck, I realized that I keep on doing the same movements.
The best part of the whole experience, seriously, is the 15 minutes meditation at the end. It was the best stillness I'd experienced. I was in corpse pose, feeling my breathing, being aware of my breathes and having the sensation of floating. I saw myself in a space suit, lying in a space pod and just floating. I know I wasn't asleep because even though I had the floating sensation, I was so grounded.
I am going back to the hotel now. It's been a long day with the travelling and the meditation class. I just wish there is a place like this in Bangkok. A place like this where the air is cleaner, more natural setting, eating healthy food, yet a little bit more modern.
Oh, did I tell you, my hotel is a bungalow in the middle of the rice paddy!
Namaste and hatsa mana.
Ms Mak
Saturday, November 3, 2007
The happiest days of my life
It's over. THe gala night is over and it's the happiest day of my life.
All my hard work has paid off. It's been really great.
Everybody only has good words for the party.
Wonderful, marvelous, stupendous, etc, etc,etc.
This would make my trip oh, so much sweeter.
All my hard work has paid off. It's been really great.
Everybody only has good words for the party.
Wonderful, marvelous, stupendous, etc, etc,etc.
This would make my trip oh, so much sweeter.
Thursday, November 1, 2007
Work almost done
Tomorrow is a big day. All my work that I'd been concentrate on is going very well, so far. Some snags 
here and there. All I want is for it to be over so I can go to Bali.
The only major snag will be the receptionist resigned suddenly. She was supposed to be my center when I am away. But now she is gone. After a few phone calls and deliberation, everything should work out fine by tomorrow.
A funny snag is there is a rumor that the Governor might attend tomorrow, and I have no knowledge about it. The people on the other side didn't know anything about it.
The girls here are busy rearranging their lives so they can go on vacation too.
Things are looking fine, if you take a far away perspective of the whole situation. My life is good.
here and there. All I want is for it to be over so I can go to Bali.The only major snag will be the receptionist resigned suddenly. She was supposed to be my center when I am away. But now she is gone. After a few phone calls and deliberation, everything should work out fine by tomorrow.
A funny snag is there is a rumor that the Governor might attend tomorrow, and I have no knowledge about it. The people on the other side didn't know anything about it.
The girls here are busy rearranging their lives so they can go on vacation too.
Things are looking fine, if you take a far away perspective of the whole situation. My life is good.
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Bali on my Mind
Bali is on my mind. I am so sick of work and can't wait for next week because I am going to Bali for 8 days. I paid my deposit and confirmed my flights. I am going for sure.
This morning I found another trip-Egypt. This trip will be over New Years. Will have to find a room mate for this trip. A good trip to do since I have like a million days of vacation. Somehow I forgot to vacation for the past 18 months.
The last time I went to Bali was over ten years ago. I took my mother with me since she wants to go too. It was the only trip that mother and daughter. So Bali have special meaning for me. I didn't get to take her to China because she was so indecisive.
I am so sick of work that I don't even want to go the gala night this Friday. I just want this shindig to be over and done with. I am already preparing for when I get back from Bali. I guess I have put most of my time and dedication into this project that I have expend myself. Seeing the project come to life is almost like a let down. Also, this is my ultimate goal two years ago. After this I have concentrate on another career goal
I can see my self doing yoga and getting spa massages, a batik lesson, shopping and visiting cultural stuff. The highlight of this trip is I get to attend a Law of Attraction seminar. So I am reading up on the subject again.
I can't wait.
Monday, October 29, 2007
TGIF on Monday
I can't wait until this Friday. When It's Friday and the clock hits midnight, then I am official free. I am on vacation.
So now I have to look busy. Not really, I am really busy, busy, busy.
I still have to confirm my vacation because . . .busy, busy. busy.
At any rate, I will have to plan and do things in advance this week. Finalize my vacation after the 1st. Then I should be just find unless Murphy's decides to visit me. But there is a solution to every problem.
This past weekend I had a busy weekend, but also relaxing. I went shopping for shoes and got a facial. Also, I went out of town for some merit making, met some people that I haven't seen in many, many years. Even have enough time to go shopping and come home, cook dinner for the next week. I even went to sleep early and feel rested.
My mind is clouded. Clouded with thoughts of what will happen after my vacation. Will I be stuck with my present job duties? Is there some one who will replace me? What will I be doing once there is someone to replace me? Will I get the raise that I deserve? If don't get what I want, should I leave any way? If I don't get what I want, then negotiate less hours (or less days per week) but with the same pay?Then, how about my business? Shall I return and do the business? Or jump straight in to the other business? Or do both (with the condition that my day job is not so demanding)? Can I really tolerate the WBS management team? Can I avoid attend long, drawn-out, boring, lack of direction, meeting that go around in circles without an end? Or business that I have to travel to meet with prospective? Or forget about business altogether and do some investing instead?
Do I have a way out for all these questions? Are there still o
ther questions that I haven't thought of? My fears are manifesting because I need direction in my life. I am hoping that by the end of my vacation, I will get some clarity regarding the directions of my life.So apply the LOA. So what do I want?
Oh can't wait for my retreat in Bali. I really deesrve it.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
"Happiness is making the most of what you have."
From the quote, one can tell that I'd been busy and rather satisfied with my performance at work. But the caveat is that I don't want to be there and yet I can't seem to convince myself to leave.I'd been busy about many things. First of all-work. In 8 days, al my work this past few weeks will culminate in a gala dinner which would my greatest achievement yet. Yes, I am happy and grateful that all my work will come to its full blossom very soon. Like a larvae struggling out of its cocoon. In eight days I will be free.
I'd been waiting for this freedom that I dreamt of for months and months. At first I was going to Barcelona, but my friends bailed. That was not going to stop me from flying away. So I got busy doing busy work and decided on a yoga retreat. You know what the domestic retreats looks good and really enticing but very expensive. It's cheaper for me to go on a retreat in Bali and enjoy on all the yoga I want. And you know, I get to attend a seminar on LOA. Yipee!
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
46/100 Blog hopping
Actually blog hopping is a drain on your energy. But, not after you did all your work and I'd been working very hard until this afternoon. This is the calm before the storm.
I have been writing for some days now because I'd been busy that I am naked at the end of the day. Also, I am addicted to my DVDs, watching movies that I'd missed when they were in town.
I'd been so concentrated one the one important task which would be the highlight of my career. The Awards and Awards night Although, I haven't been working on the Awards night that much, my reward is going for the tastings. The people who are helping are great and has been a great help to me in achieving my task.
Alas, now that I can see the brass ring around the corner, I have to decide what to do next. Stick to my original plan and quit my job work at my business. Or ride the wave and see what happen.
At this point in my life, I want to ride the wave and see how "as TTA turns" pans out. If I listen to the fortune teller, then I should wait until after November 15 before concentrate on the business.
At this point I feel like a child in the middle of a whirlpool. The scenes that spinning around is the options I have laid out for myself. One scene is riding the wave out and now I have to wait to see if funding is place. Second scene is no funding in place, then coast the ride until another company comes along. Third scene, quit and work on the business. Fourth, ride the coast and find other channels to earn my 100,000 monthly passive income.
For real, I have to earn that passive income because it would be very beneficial to my life. After going to the 'House and Condo show', I really can't see myself owning anything if I can't get the passive income. Boo hoo hoo.
I guess I let the scene spin around a bit more and perhaps, clarity will come to me.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
40/100 A Midway blog
Why, you're in the middle of work. Stop by and blog!
I feel like I am waking up from a long sleep. More like a bear waking up from hibernation but I wasn't hibernating, rather I was working long hours in a closed area, countig the days to my freedom.
40 days ago I would have been estatic because I would really be free. But now I'd feel like I been bitch slapped and still disoriented from the blunt force. I am not sure what I am waking up to.
40 days ago I was sure that I will leave and work on my business. Then the melodrama began. One thing for sure the situation have changed and I am still part of the game. The other side of the game, the one I wanted to be in doesn't look too good anymore. Even so, this side of the game, although is the winning side, will not get what I really want.
Considering the overall point of view, staying with winner team will not improve my situation. But going to the other side might, no guarantees, get me what I want but but I would have to be sacrificing day-to-day satisfaction and contentment for the potential money I might earn.
W are having a team meeting this Friday and from the pseudo-boss, we will ave lots of changes. More and more projects are coming in and already confirmed, so plenty f work to do. The new company is progressing, although at a slow pace, will go ahead. I already saw the changes, however, I do not see my situation changing at all.
If I go to the business, with the organization I can't really give my full support to, I will get what I want. Sacrifice e time, for th long-term result.
I just hope that when I emerge into the light, I will now which road to take. Oh, what to do. What to do.
Monday, October 8, 2007
37/100 Why am I so happy!
'Why are you so happy' was the remark my pseudo boss said to me today. I didn't realize that I was happy.
Even after the working hour, I even got yoga and meditation in for day. I had the deepest sleep for about 10 minutes. I floated into bliss.
I had a very long but good day today. I worked and worked and worked my fingers to the bone. I didn't check my private emails until I got home. That's very rare, especially that I was in the office all day.
I must say that today's a perfect working day. And I celebrated by do the yoga and meditation. After a day like today, falling down the stairs (in public, to, I must add) didn't matter anymore.
Yes, I had a very good, fulfilled and happy day.
Friday, October 5, 2007
35/100 I survived
What do you mean- 'I survived.' You're not survivor or any other reality show.
I survived the first week of the NCCA-something I'd be dreaming and dreading-congruently-for the past two years ever since they pulled the plug the last time. I dreamt of it because it was it was promised to the members of the organization I am invovled with I read i because its the first time in this nation that this award is happening and progressing. Lets say that I am vested in this venture.
I survived the wek of running aroud, coordinating logistics, people movement, people participation, etc. Anyone who have organized any big event will know. Anyone who have organized a big event single-handedly will understand and perhaps symphatize.
I will not go into the detail of the process here. This blog is not about the awards-it's about LOA and and everyting that has to do with it. This blog is not my daily journal, butt it will aappear to be so. However, you can't call it a daily bog because Ihaven't 'blogged' in a few day.
Why am I here today?
I was on my way home and realized that I would like to go shopping for some DVD. This doesn't happen often because I have a person who comes and deliver DVDs of my choice to me. But, alas, she doesn't carry the type of DVDs I 'desired'. I don't use the word 'want because it connotate a yearning or yen of such DVDs.
For examaple, a hot summer days day. The neighborhood icecream truck comes by and the children line up to buy their favorite iceceram. Yeah, the idea of having an iceceam bar sound good so you queue up aand buy your icecream. Now, that is desire. However, if you really think that a chocolate fudge sundae is exactly what you want, then that's 'want.'
One can look up a dictionary and findd what I'd describe is the opposite of each other. But that's my definition.
Before I degress any further, I went shopping for some fitness DVDs. And before I knew, I had much more than DVDs. When it's time for me to head home, I took the train ande before my home station, I realized that it's raining cats and dogs. I could ageet out and wait for the train to subside but it would mean that I will be at station just sstaring out into the open waiting for the rain to stop. It's like watching the kettle boil or the paint dry. It doesn't happen fast enough.
So I decided to find a place where I do something while waiting for the rain to stop. I could go see a picture show but I have not idea whats is showing. Or I can go to a bar and down a couple before I headed home (again). Ah, I was just having dinner, a Japanese restaurant, and I down a bottleof sake. Ummm, it was good. I haven't had sake in a very long titme.
So I ended up in an internet cafe writing this blog. It's a good thing too, because I can look out the window and see if the rain have stop. Freankly, it doesn't make a difference because it's so dark outside, it's hard to tell.
At any rate, going to the overview of today is what I would all a 50/50. 50 perent you control (so you think) and tthe other 50 percent you have no control over.
Okay, the 50 opercent I have control over::
- I have to get to a cleient by 9.30 AM. So it leaves me some time to get my e-mail answered between 11 and lunch time.
- Get thee-mail blast done.
- Prepare for next week
A call comes in this morning and it's th boss. Our appointment is reall for an hour later than I thought. Damn. So I went to the office but at the trainstation, I realized that I forgot my metro card. Counting the trips that I plan to make on the Metro today, Idecided to get an one-dday pass. To make a long story short- everything worked fine but I ended up going to the office before I go to the client. Got a few things done--yeah.
So I headed to the client. Everything was fine until I got to the client and boom-they haven't a clue why I am there. The person that I was dealing with have left and no seem to know thing about what I talking about. To conclude the story, the two people I know left the company. And the peson in charge of the matter was on holidays. After a while, I got to the right peeople and yes, as I suspect they haven't a clue. I have to reschedule. And its a good thing that the boss was there so I didn't have to explain myself too much.
The best thing that came out of this deblocal is that I got to ride back to the office. So we talked about whats going on. What happened in the apast few days. And mostly importantly which directly is "As TTA turns" is going to. Firstly, no onehave commented to anything, event he boss. And the TWTC is still securing funding. Just as I thought, there must be some hiccups because things are progressing too slow for a 'done deal'.
This doesna't sit well in my mind. If things remain the same -- then m life remains the same. I have to re-evaluate the situation. I may have to revert back to my original plan of leaving the company althogether.
Then I get to the office right at lunch time. I go to the restaurant and there, my colleagues were finishing lunch. Good, this would mean a free lunch -- it would cost the office and I get to guys to buy-in to the situation next week. But at lunch, I get more information about the new company. It doesn't look good.
This didn't bother me at al I must say. Yet, in the afternoon, I was feeling pretty up and rearing to go because I have a million and one things to sort out. My friend came to visit me and brought me some stuff. so this weekend I ma go to a meeting instead of laying in bed playing a computer game.
This when I get down to realy working, I find somemore thigs I have to overcome. It's notning major, rather minor in retrospetive, but I got it all done. So I am feeling very good.
End up IM a friend that I have spoken to in a very long time. Perhaps over 12 months. It's nice to vent--mildly speaking. Unwind the day relating about whats going on ion my life casually. Getting another prospective to whats happening. I am not too worried about whats happened. I am not too worried about what's going to happen. I aam feeling really good!
This feelaing good is really good for me. I have reward myself and and that's how I eventually ended up going DVD shopping, having sake for dinner and getting caught in the rain. Very roundabout way of recounting my day.
The rain has stop and I eally want to go home. You know what would make today perfect, if I don't forget to buy milk on my way back home.
Yes, I am the champion!Monday, October 1, 2007
31/100 October 1st
I thought today will be a busy day. I have it planned out and everything went accordingly.
I found a very good coaching site on the internet. Its www.simpleology.com by Mark Joyner. It so simple and straightforward (and down right silly) but it gets to the point. Since I began the daily lessons, and daily praxies - I get alot done and a very short time without worry about the outcome. I learning to not to sweat over the small stuff.
It's like a simple to do list. Great because you don't feel guilty went you don't finish whats on you list. You become aware of your actions, tasks and deeds -- the good ones and ones that drain your energies.
It also keeps you focus on your goals. I like the way they break it down: short term (one to two week time span), medium terms (2 weeks to 6 months) and long term (6 months to 3 years). You write your goals down and answer the questions regarding the goals. It's up to you to determine your deadline.
I haven't finished the course yet, but I just know it will be good. Hey, if it's good for me, then it will be good for you.
The course is making my life simple thus far and I want to keep it this way.
Namaste,
Ms Mak
Saturday, September 29, 2007
29/100
It's almost been 30 days since I started this experiment. The results so far?
It's been noticeable that I get al my work done without much resentment. Before this experiment, I hated my job so much that I would so up at word and be disruptive to my co-workers, my duties and responsible. How much I wish to be fired.
I joined a business hoping to earn a good enough income that I don't have to worry about money while hating everything about it. I hated the promotions and initiatives that were put forth. But I stayed on because I felt like it's my only choice to make money fast so I can walk out of the job and thumb my fingers at them.
I still feel all the above but things have changed. Like I said, I am doing my job without much resentmemt. My ill feelings about the business organization is still there but I try to find way to distance myself from it. I put forth my ideal job/career to the big boss. Yes, I did write down that ultimately I would like to combine wellness and travel through travel journalism and yoga instructor. She expected me to think outside the box, so I did.
Now that a new month is about to start and it will be a very busy month for me. I would like to see how this LOA will unfold in my daily life. And by the end of 100 days, how much closer do I consider myself in reaching or achieving my ultimate life? At the moment- I am not even close to what I ultimately picture myself doing.
Its Saturdaymorning and the voices in my head are at a Mexican stand-off whether I should go to the N21 meeting or the H&C show. I will keep you posted.
Mamaste,
MsMak.
Thursday, September 27, 2007
27/100 My life have just begun
Cute, huh?
Sorry, I haven't written lately. The past few days have been blah as far as what's happening in my life. So I took it easy and did what I have to do like late night I went to see the doctor about the rash on my face. Basically, I took care to things and it's a good thing too because for the next two weeks I will not have the time to do so.
I can't believe that it's almost 30 days since I started this 100 days challenge. I must say that I can see the changes in my attitude. I am aware that my thoughts, my words and my feelings are important, so I am very conscientious about them. I am aware about positive outcomes and clarity in my desires. Also, I make myself aware about what I am attracting to my life and how I am moving closer to my desired outcome.
What do I want after this 100 days challenge? After this 100 days, I want to see a clear direction on how to move my life to get my desired results. I still want what I want but I am certain that within these 100 days, I will move towards the desired results in my life. And from there I can move on and towards my desires.
For "As TTA Turns", the saga is still going well. Still have a long way to go until a new story line emerges. As far as my business is concern, I have put it in hiatus becausde of the last organization meeting and how I (strongly) felt regarding the asisnine initiatives put forth. My foretune teller told me that things will be clear after the 15th November. And I should be careful about going into business full-time.
I'll keep you posted regarding "As TTA Turns" and my business.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
My daydream du jour
Ever since I started this LOA experience, reading more books then I ever read while I was in school, I begin to have daydream du jour.
Let me tell you about my daydream du jour. If any of you have been following as "As TTA turns", you know that Dee have sold the company last week. You know that I, in this case, we met "De Bos" last Thursday at lunch. I announced that I would like to take up a career where I can combine my two loves, travel and wellness.
I can imagine myself going to Macchu Picchu and climbing to the top to enjoy the sunrise or sunset at the summit. Take time to do yoga or mediate on the top. Possible, very possible. Dee, jokingly, stated "Michelle takes on S. America." And all I can do is to smile but inside I wan screaming. Yes, one can say I have a control issue.
Okay, take a deep breathe and let it pass through you.
I can take S. America on day a time and meanwhile get into real estate in Costa Rica or somewhere cheap because I am going to be renting these properties to American or European retirees. There it goes, another stream of passive income.
Let me tell you about my daydream du jour. If any of you have been following as "As TTA turns", you know that Dee have sold the company last week. You know that I, in this case, we met "De Bos" last Thursday at lunch. I announced that I would like to take up a career where I can combine my two loves, travel and wellness.
I can imagine myself going to Macchu Picchu and climbing to the top to enjoy the sunrise or sunset at the summit. Take time to do yoga or mediate on the top. Possible, very possible. Dee, jokingly, stated "Michelle takes on S. America." And all I can do is to smile but inside I wan screaming. Yes, one can say I have a control issue.
Okay, take a deep breathe and let it pass through you.
I can take S. America on day a time and meanwhile get into real estate in Costa Rica or somewhere cheap because I am going to be renting these properties to American or European retirees. There it goes, another stream of passive income.
Friday, September 21, 2007
What do I want? Part 2
- To earn at least 100000 baht (about $2,900) a month so that renovate the house. I will start renovate the house by building a spare room and bathroom upstairs so that Sri can stay there. Then I will renovate my bedroom and bathroom in conjunction with expanding the balcony, and a small working area for myself. Then comes the back of the house where it will have to be rebuilt so I can expand the kitchen and dining room. Redecorate the living room completely and move laundry area from upstairs to downstairs.
- I want to quit my job and have time to grow my business. This would mean that I will have time to go to yoga everyday if I wish.
- My favorite: Travel the world and visit the "seven wonders of world" especially now that there are fourteen wonders.
- Combine my two loves: travel and wellness in a career. I can go take a yoga class with a specific swarmi or a LOA seminar in different countries and write about it- a blog, magazine, etc.
- I want to earn 100,000 (about $3000) of passive income on top of my usual income.
- I want to build my dream house in Chiang Mai or Chiang Rai, for me when I retire. In retirement, I want to live in a community near a school or college so I able to teach English or whatever the kids would like to know. Maybe take u a part-time teachers assistants in a school.
- I want to live my life to the fullest and be happy.
I guess it's okay to expand my dreams in LOA. I am glad I revisited my "desires" so to speak because I am realizing that what is happening now is what I have attracted to my life! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!!!
The end of Part 1 for today. See you again, tonight.
Lots of love,
Ms Mak
Thursday, September 20, 2007
De Bos
Ja, I met de Bos today at lunch. Big, burly, ex rugby type Dutch man with a good sense of humor.As a person, I like. But as the boss, I have to wait and see. Personal, I am skeptical about the move because I have doubt that I will be fulfilled.
I have to let go of my doubt. So I went to the fortune teller. I sat there frustrated because I believed that he's not telling what I want to hear. But he told that I have decision to make. I should not take the full fledge plunge into business. If I really want to go into business I should wait until after my next birthday. I should partner up with a friend instead of doing it alone.
If I stay at job, which will changed now that the company been sold, I have a good opportunity to further my career.
How much do I want to scream right now. If I follow my guts, then I'll have to quit the business because of the initiatives of the other night I am so opposed to it that it's not funny anymore. And judging from the ROI, then I should quit the business. But if I do, then I will have to be a slave to the 9-5 and no travel reporter nor a yoga instructor in the future. From the time I have left in the working years, and years to enjoy my bliss then I be a slave!!!
Oh, how do I want to scream!!!!!
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Today is another day
Today is another day the I really feel angry but a good angry because it showed me all that I don't want.I have been digesting the information of last night in my head. I have to do it in my head because I really can't discuss this with my colleague. I feel very different from the others that I have to pretend "to go with the flow".
I noticed that Pim really doesn't want to talk to me. I suspect that she drear my answers if asked the question that will change my status right away.
At any rate, I had lunch with Ek. And I can't keep my silence anymore so I told him. I told everything and how I felt about the situation. I felt good after I told him. It was a release, I let go and came back to my intention. My intention of ownership. I own me, I own my life, I own my time.
As time went by , the evening came and I went to the other office because of the scheduled organizational meeting. It's one of those meeting I don't like to attend because I get very little out of it. This time it was different. I got alot-both positive and negative.
First the negative. The first half of the meeting MS came out and announced some initiatives that I adamantly disagree. 1) He buying a disco so the organizational can party for free!!!!! I don't support the party initiative and now I will not support the activity. Secondly, he begged for money to cover a bad business deal he made. Who do you think he is!!!! More and more, he's beginning to sound like evangelistic leader trying to siphon off momey from the congregation. This really irked me!!!!!
Now the second half of the meeting is very useful for the business. I got a lot of techniques and methods to do business. It repeated and confirm what was said on Sunday by PC. THis makes me feel good again.
Enough said. I have to seek a sing of which way the correct flow is going.
I go to do. Good night,
Ms Mak
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
A new job? A new career?
What is in it for me? I have to ask myself that question.
Today, my boss announced the sale of the company to another organization. 95% she said. There is still that 5% that tio the scale to the other side. She have done this before by saying that she is sure we were getting this or that project. Then the project fall through and all hope shatter.
Actually I knew this coming about three weeks ago. She kinda spill it out in a drunk rant about things that are happening. I didn't right then because I been wanting to leave the company for sometime now. When she announce the probably sale of the company again I now so sure I am going with her.
I must admit that I'm excited for the company because it's a good sign that the company is going on the right path. The company is worth something in the outside market. It's a very good sign for the company. But what is in for me?
I am not sure. I really don't fit in the company to begin with. The company, as it, will be completely transformed into something completely different as it stands now. I really don't fit in the structure of the old company, what more in this new company?
I checked out the website. I checked what positions are available in the other company. Again, I really don't fit in.
I know that I am guarantee a position but as what? I can write my own job description and perhaps negotiate a new salary. I have to ask myself the question what is in it for me?
My fear is rearing its ugly head. And the worst thing for me is I really can't discuss this with nor do I want to discuss my deepest fear with them. My deepest fear is that I go on to a great new position and again get bored or disillusioned because my time is not my own.
I just have to wait and see where the river is flowing and go with the tide, keeping in mind that I still want at least 100000 a month whihc is 4 times what I am making now.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
My Dreams of Travelling
You see my suitcase packed and really to go. Even as a child, I always dream of seeing the 7 wonders of the world. My childhood list consist of
- Great Wall of China
- Taj Mahal
- Angkor Wat
- Leaning Tower of Pisa
- Colossuem, Rome
- Pyramids of Giza
- Stonehedge
- Petra, Jordan
- Macchu Picchu, Peru
- Chichen Itza, Mexico
- Christ Redeemer, Brazil
- Great Wall of China
- Taj Mahal
- Angkor Wat
- Leaning Tower of Pisa
- Colossuem, Rome
- Pyramids of Giza
- Stonehedge
- Petra, Jordan
- Macchu Picchu, Peru
- Chichen Itza, Mexico
- Christ Redeemer, Brazil
-
The Acropolis,
- Kremlin/St. Basil, Russia
- Neuschwanstein Castle, Germany
- Statue of Liberty, USA - go back to NYAC and maybe re-live my days way back when
- Sydney Opera House, Australia
- Timbuktu, Mali
- Burma and vist all place like Pagan, etc
- Luang Prabang, Load
- Vietnam
- Phonom Pehn
- Pranom Rung Palace, Esan, Thailand
- Pimai, Thailand
- Jakarata, Indonesia,
- Jogjakarata, Indonesia
- Lombok, Indonesia,
- Sulawesi
- Kota Kina Baru, East Malaysia
- Taiwan
- Tokya, Japan,
- Kyoto Japan,
- Sapporao, Japan
- Korea
- Mongolia
- Nepal
- Tibet
- Bhutan
- Luxor, Egypt
- Asswam Dam
- Morroco
- Tangiers
- Rock of Gilbartar
- Malta
- Barcelona
- Madrid
- Valencia
- Bilboa
- Palace of Versailles
- Monaco
- Lyons
- Avingonn
- Cologne Germany
- Neurumberg
- Switzerland
- Piedmont Italy
- Tuscany
- Florence, what a beautiful city
- Rome
- Vactican City
- Capris
- Naplea
- Pompeeii
- Sicily
- Crete Greece
- Rhodes Greece
- Mykonos
- Istanbul Turkey
- Itzmir turkey
- Transavania
- Buenos Aires
- Veneuzela
- Rio(the Mardi Gras)
- South Africa
- Kenya
- Sahara Dessert
- Toronto
- Quebec
- Whistler (with my sister since see has a condo there)
- Alaska
- Seattle
- Oregon
- San Francisco
- Las Vega (to visit my cousin)
- Grand Canyon
- Houston (Visit friends)
- San Antonio
- Disneyland (my paradis on earth)
- Miami
- Costa Rica
- Jamaica
- Bora Bora
- Fiji
- Tahiti
- Copenhagen
- Scotland
- Ireland
- St Petersburg, Russia
- Moscow, Russia
I can write a blog and take photos. That's really the reason behind all the travelling.
What do you think!!!!
Giddy up,
Ms. Mak
Saturday, September 15, 2007
14/100
You see the tired pup pic. That's the way I am feeling now, but it's a good feeling because I'd been working like a dog. With that being said, I had a fulfilling week as far as work is concern.
For business, I had a good week considering that I haven't been in the office for two weeks. My prospective called an talked to me about the business. That really doesn't happen very often.
What am I grateful today? I am grateful that
- Today's Friday, I have a very full weekend. I got to a meeting, then to the reunion and to the chairman's tour seminar.
- I paid for my advertising and faxed over the receipt. Which meaning I have to kick my own ass to the next few weeks.
- I cleared the miscommunication with Standard Chartered and I think things are looking up in that arena.
- I got the templates back to the applicants so that they can amend it and things are looking good in that arena there too.
- I got my resume updated and if Pim thinks its not enough then I can amend it but also tell her what I really think
- The new receptionist will start on Monday which will alleviate my office management workload.
Adieu,
Ms. Mak
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
12/100 It's geting clearer
I am now living a full and complete life in body, mind, and soul.
As far as work is concern, I got a lot of work done. Even things are not finished, I got a load of work done.
It's getting clearer now that I saw what I really wanted. "Ownership" I want ownership on everything n my life. I want ownership on my time - I dictate of where I go, what I do, who I am with, the house I live in, etc. I want to own my job, which is own my own business. I want to own my time, that means I can practice yoga at anytime. I want to 'own' my friends and colleagues which mean that I choose my friends and colleagues-- not the other way around. I want to own I house I live in, which can go two ways: 1) fix this house and maybe my sisters out and 2) buy a condo. When I have ownership on everything and every part of my life then I can truly do and be all that I can be.
I can see the picture in my head which will the movie of my life unfolding in front of me. And that's the reason being the two affirmations today.
It's getting clearer now that I saw what I really wanted. "Ownership" I want ownership on everything n my life. I want ownership on my time - I dictate of where I go, what I do, who I am with, the house I live in, etc. I want to own my job, which is own my own business. I want to own my time, that means I can practice yoga at anytime. I want to 'own' my friends and colleagues which mean that I choose my friends and colleagues-- not the other way around. I want to own I house I live in, which can go two ways: 1) fix this house and maybe my sisters out and 2) buy a condo. When I have ownership on everything and every part of my life then I can truly do and be all that I can be.
I can see the picture in my head which will the movie of my life unfolding in front of me. And that's the reason being the two affirmations today.
| Life is what I make of it. I have control over my own life. I gain strength from struggles I have won. I gain wisdom from my experiences. I gain joy from the love in my own heart. | |
Perhaps tonight I can get a good night sleep. I'd been sleeping late and still going to work tired.
So good night.
Charmed,
Ms. Mak
So good night.
Charmed,
Ms. Mak
9/11 anniversay
Has it been 6 years since the fateful day when the planes crashed into the twin towers. As a former resident of NYC, I salute all of the survivors of that day.
I really don't like to think about that day. I just don't want to find out of who might have been in the building or the area when it happened. If I find out who was that means that there is only one degree of separation behind me and that people.
Actually, it was a miracle. All the stories I heard of about that day were just miraculous. My friend Fernie and Kaori were working in UN Building so they were spared. Mark was stuck Long Island. My cousins, Yonnie and Marilou, have retired and no longer commuted into city via the PATH. Dorothy;s husband, whom I really don't know, decided to take the ferry into the city instead of the PATH. My former brother-in-law was suppose to be at the Pentagon that morning but took another flight to DC and totally missed the whole situation. Most of all, I saw Tim on TV, in the fres, so to speak.
After that kind of miracles from such a horrendous event, I didn't look any deeper. I was sure that if I dig deep I would find someone affect by the tragic event and then it would have a profound effect on me.
At any rate, I am bidding adieu and hasta manna.
Sincerely,
Ms. Mak
Sunday, September 9, 2007
9/100 It's a working Sunday
It's a working Sunday. I haven't worked on a Sunday for quite a while now. What I really mean is that I haven't devoted my time to my business for some time now. Sot feels good and strange when you'd been away and you have to jump into it. I have loads of things to keep up it.I don't like working on Sunday although its the most important day for the business. By working on Sunday, it means that your business is growing. My teammate confirmed my opinion that the format of the seminar is such a waste of time because speakers will go over time, will start repeating themselves and it seem that they do so just to kill time. The most important part of the meeting is actually the very last hour. By that time, the person have already sat through 8 hours of information and as if it's not enough, they are giving 24 hours to think and mull over the info just to decide 'yes' or 'no' to the business.
I am so confused because I loved the idea of the business-the wellness business. Yet, I really don't so many things about the organization. I feel like I am contradicting my desires, my intentions because of my feeling about the organization's executives are borderline negative. It's the way they do things I really don't agree with.
I could go along and do what I am suppose to do but I can't feel enthusiastic about the situation. I am wondering if I can truly believe that is my way that I can achieve my desires. I am certainly if I stay in my regular job, then it would be like staying in a marriage just for the children's sake. But if I continue this on these parallel courses then I am in a bad marriage and in another bad relationship on the side. Oy vay.
So today I am grateful for the following:
- Now I am ready to do real work for my business and put money into it again. I didn't advertise last month because I was feeling overwhelmed however, I found out that last month's lots were all incomplete and it would have been a throwing good money after bad if I advertised.
- Even though it was a working Sunday, I got to meet lots of my teammates that I haven't seen in a while. It wasn't so stressed out but rather relaxing.
- I began reading a new book. After neglecting reading for a while, now I am making time to read again. Reading books and not only e-books or e-articles on the net.
- Even though I had a guest and she couldn't make it tomorrow, I get to go to the party and I get to go to yoga tomorrow. Yeah!
- 9 out of 10 said that I am looking slimmer, which is a bonus because I haven't been trying to lose weight. Just trying to get more exercise (yoga) into my schedule.
Today's affirmation: I now desire a richer, fuller, and more abundant life and that desire is becoming my everyday reality.
It's been a long day and tomorrow is the start of another week of the regular job. I can't wait until I can resolve this dual lives that I am living. Good night and see you again tomorrow.
Warmly,
Ms. Mak
Warmly,
Ms. Mak
Saturday, September 8, 2007
It's Saturday night
It's Saturday, only a few hours since this morning and it's busy a busy afternoon and evening. So before winding down I would like to give thanks to:
I have to remember this for tomorrow. I am going to say god night and see you today if I am not to tired from the long day.
Ms Mak
- I went to the office (for my business) for the first time in two weeks. You can say I took a vacation from the business. My team was there and I got help from them. Also, for a bonus, I got one guest for tomorrow
- I got all that I wanted to get done (including this blog) today.
- Got medicine for my skin condition so I can get rid of the rash. Did a litle shopping for the home and paid bills.
- Optimize my desktop. Remind me to optimize my laptop, too.
- I saw my sister today. There are some weekends when I don't get to see her or talk to her at all. Mostly my fault.
Today's affirmation: I AM OPEN TO RECEIVING.
I have to remember this for tomorrow. I am going to say god night and see you today if I am not to tired from the long day.
Ms Mak
It's Saturday Morning
It's Saturday morning and its a good morning.
And watching a movie on my DVD. It's a lovely comedy about dogs nd you know ai love dogs.
Yesterday was a very busy for me and my personal life.
- Firstly, I have so many people who wanted to help me in my business. A very good sign because I'd been very quiret in my business for a while now.
- Secondly, I did one good thing for myself and my future. I bought into a retirement fund at a very reasonable price and at a value more than I planned.
- Thirdly, a cousin who seldom ever calls me, rang and asked me to do him a favorable. A very good favor and I am glad to help. What are family for anyway if you don't help each other.
- Fourthly, I had a massage for myself among old and new friends. Really did something to my neck and shoulders. Made me realized that need to take care of my neck and shoulders. Lots of tension and stressed there.
- Fifthly, I had a good night sleep and at a very reasonable hour. I'd been having restless sleep and sleep at very late and waking up early. This makes me a very groggy and grouchy person in the morning.
Ms Mak
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